Rating: 1.5 Pulses
Timothy Olyphant, Dougray Scott, Olga Kurylenko
Directed by Xavier Gens
Rated R
Hitman is reminiscent of many other major Hollywood films. Imagine crossing The Transporter with any of the Bourne movies?that would probably be more entertaining than this film. Plus, the dialogue you generate in your head would be more thought out than the script of Hitman.
If I sound bored it’s because I was. I can think of a thousand better ways to spend 90 minutes than watching Xavier Gen’s Hitman.
The movie is firstly very vague. It opens with a brief look at the main character, 47, as a child. This back story is the length of the opening credits. It doesn’t feature any dialogue or push the story forward, it just features a bad rock song and a bunch of kids in robes. Then the film begins abruptly. The scenes are choppy and the narrative doesn’t flow. It is almost like someone took 20 short clips, smashed them together and called it a film.
The dialogue in the movie is awful. I think the writers looked at the back of the video game box and merely adapted that as the screenplay. Every word of the film is expected and cheesy.
Overall, the graphics were OK, at best. Nothing new or revolutionary was attempted. I promise, you have seen all the stunts before.
There were, however, two good aspects of the movie. In almost every scene, 47 kills someone. I say this is good only because that part did remind me of a video game.
The second thing I liked was that Olga Kurylenko, as Mika, a Russian prostitute caught in the web of a crime syndicate and freed by 47, takes off her clothes. A lot. At least there was an appeal to the prurient interest, which all males can enjoy.
My favorite scene is one in which 47 walks into a Russian night club. Of course, there are gangsters selling arms, blowing cocaine, and tossing around a bunch of cash with half-clad females. Then a fight breaks out and cocaine and money rain down in the midst of gunfire.
I almost laughed.
It was the personification of Hollywood action movie decadence.
This movie is horrible. Stick to the video game or watch it only after you have watched every other movie in the world, or if some sucker rents it, your car is broken down, and you are stuck at his house.
