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Equal Opportunity

For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given

For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given

The little man’s still rocking and rolling. We luckily don’t have to worry about him keeping his milk down; he keeps nearly every calorie he can get.

Really, it’s great he’s so healthy. He’s a fine mini me. He will always let you know if he’s hungry or dirty, but otherwise he’s just observing the great big world. The only problem—it’s hard to find shoes for him. Not that he’s even walking yet, but he does jump around in his bouncy seat and may need some support for comfort’s sake soon.

His feet are built like biscuits; and that’s not the shape that most shoes come in.

OK, debate among yourselves: who’s the top Caucasian running back in the NFL?

It’s a trick question; there are no starting white running backs in the NFL.

I want equal opportunity. Sure, I’m not as skilled, but I want to be considered for a job as an NFL running back based on my race, not my skill set and real viability as a candidate. We need diversity people!

The Rooney Rule, implemented by the league in 2003, requires teams to interview at least one minority candidate for an open head coaching position. Shouldn’t a similar standard apply to the running back position? It’s all in the name of equal opportunity.
Now that I think about it, you don’t see many female free safeties or Oriental defensive tackles either. Prejudiced NFL.

Look, I know I’ve not even tried out for an NFL team, so don’t go benching Chris Johnson in Indianapolis on my account or anything. But I’ll jump in there if a team wants a white boy. Just look at the numbers—6’, 205 lbs. I’m close to halfback material; get with me after the holidays, I’ll put on another 10 pounds for playoff time. What, not the kind of pounds you’re looking for? Discrimination!

The Christmas season is here, and in Murfreesboro this means the good people on Hamilton Drive will have their rocking synchronized music and lights show blasting sensory magic. Tell your friends and family about this impressive display. It’s honestly worth the drive to the ‘Boro from practically anywhere in the mid-state.

Peace,

Bracken Mayo,
Editor in Chief

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About the Author

Bracken, a 2003 graduate of MTSU’s journalism program, is the founder and publisher of the Murfreesboro Pulse. He lives in Murfreesboro with his wife, graphic artist and business partner, Sarah, and sons, Bracken Jr. and Beckett. Bracken enjoys playing the piano, sushi, football, chess, Tool, jogging, his backyard, hippie music, ice skating, Chopin, rasslin’, swimming, soup, tennis, sunshine, brunch, revolution and frying things. Connect with him on LinkedIn

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