April, my favorite time of year. Not because of the pollen filling our air and noses, but because of the greatest holiday of them all: April Fools.
I didn’t get my family this year, they see it coming way back in March by now. I did come out of the closet though. Franc’is and I definitely fooled Gunner, but he wasn’t starting to hate. He was probably too confused. It is a fairly disturbing thought.
I realized recently certain products used by the U.S. military, such as radios and boots, carry brand name advertising. This led to the next logical step, one that would secure lots of extra funding for the forces without draining the American taxpayers.
Why not allow corporate advertising within the military? I can see it now, troops storming a city with the golden arches proudly stretching across their backs, a Budweiser logo on the bombs, Geico on the side of every tank. Why stop there? The U.S.S. Auto Zone will patrol the gulf.
I could even see corporate sponsors for entire wars and conflicts’the Fox News War, the West Bank Rumble brought to you by Starbucks.
It’s no worse than selling stadium or college bowl naming rights, c’mon, the Chick-Fil-A Bowl?!
Speaking of college sports, I think they showed a rerun the other day. The Florida Gators over the Ohio State Buckeyes in the NCAA championship’I could have sworn I saw that one just a few months ago.
Never mind, different ball, different sport.
A local church will host a screening of The Secret, a film that claims one can have what they want by focusing on goals and dwelling on the positive (you can read more in this issue’s movie section).
It’s seems like a solid theory, don’t dwell on your problems, see yourself overcoming them. And there is indeed a lot in the way facts are framed. A situation can be expressed a hundred different ways and still be absolutely true.
I need to stop saying ’I don’t have any money in my pocket’ and replace it with the more positive ’my assets sure are manageable.’
We should all replace ’Argh, my head hurts’ with ’my feet sure do feel great today!.’
And Sarah, it’s not an annoying car alarm out your window, it’s one bass drop short of a dance party.
Peace,
Bracken Mayo, Editor in Chief
