Johnny Depp, Keira Knightly, Orlando Bloom, Stellan Skarsgard, Bill Nighly
Directed by Gore Verbinski
Rated PG-13

The best thing about Disney green-lighting a sequel to Pirates of the Caribbean is that it gives The Pulse a chance to grill the both movies.

Depp’s claim to have drawn inspiration for the character Jack Sparrow from the Rolling Stones guitarist Keith Richards seems less likely than a lapse in inspiration forcing him to fall back upon his well-formed character, Hunter S. Thompson. Watching him swagger along beaches twirling his fingers, the mind slips easily to a scene shot in a flooded hotel room where the groggy, over-drugged Thompson awakens sporting a lizard tail and dreading the worst.

Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas was the height of his reign.
However, he immediately followed with a steady stream of increasingly disappointing money movies; The Ninth Gate, The Astronaut’s Wife, and Once Upon a Time in Mexico. Not to say that his performances were less than Depp, however, his choice of films seems to have degraded.

Now, he has put himself in a position to star in not one but three movies with one of the worst actresses to ever seduce her way into big budget films: Keira Knightley. Scenes featuring Knightley are more than a little painful to sit through, and in a film 150 minutes long, the discomfort caused by her insincerity exaggerates to the point of torment.

Acting aside, nothing can hide the dollar signs steering this clich’ gorged shipwreck. Hiding behind the guise of a children’s movie while pushing Knightley’s sexuality is just one of the foul smells shrouding this monster.

Is there any hope for our hero, the once constant Depp? Or will he be overcome by cheesy plots and sub-par supporting acting?
Perhaps the proposed adaptation of the “Rum Diary,” set to come out 2008, will veer him back to the course.