I got it: my next Halloween costume. It hit me as I was at The Boro this Halloween. Next year I will go as Brian from Destroy Destroy Destroy.
If this does not scare you, you have obviously either never seen me or never seen Brian’s stage outfit.
I wanted to see someone dressed as a tap-dancing Tony Danza, then the supreme metal band will not have to listen to complaints of false advertising any longer.
It’s always fun, but really not that hard, to tell those dressed as police officers from the real ones on Halloween.
After the Election Day smoke has settled, Tennesseans have sent the messages that they want a Republican in the Senate, a Democrat in the governor’s office and homosexuals nowhere near the state at all.
Growing weary of political ads, we at The Pulse have decided the humans have had enough press and we would feature some local animals.
Almost everyone has a pet, or has had one at some point.
Sarah has Bobbie the bobtailed black cat. She’s had her since she was a kitten, but somehow now it’s Bobbie’s apartment and she’s nice enough to let Sarah live there. It’s like the cat thinks she does a favor by allowing her owner to rub her.
Why do humans accept such unappreciative treatment from animals? Because they’re cute when they knock around a little piece of string on the ground and when they playfully pounce on a bug, rip it apart and eat it. Though if most cats were a little bigger and their claws a little sharper, it would be you they’re ripping apart.
Look for an upcoming column in The Pulse dealing with better understanding animals.
The Captain has been my loyal dog for over a decade, but he still rolls in the grass at his Pleasant View farm.
He seems pretty laid back and friendly though.
Random tip: when hauling shingles or any other large load to the dump, first spread out a chain lengthwise on the trailer and loop through a tire. After loading the junk, pull one end of the chain over the debris and reconnect with the other. A bulldozer can then yank the whole load out without having to get your friends to throw it out one piece at a time.

Peace

Bracken Mayo
Editor in Chief