Dane Cook, Dax Shepard, Jessica Simpson
Directed by Greg Coolidge
Rated PG-13

Don Calame and Chris Conroy are the main screenwriters for Employee of the Month, along with some additional changes by the director, Greg Coolidge. They should have watched Office Space and Rushmore multiple times before writing a final draft. Office Space shows how well a movie can be satirical about mundane jobs, while Rushmore shows how well a movie can be satirical about two guys fighting for the affection of one girl.

Employee of the Month tries on multiple occasions to accomplish what both of those films have done, but ends up going the slapstick route and being a cheesy movie, a rudimentary and formulaic romantic comedy.

Part of this comes about because of casting. At times it seems Employee of the Month tries to be a calling card for has-been comedians, who should find other endeavors to pursue. Such notables include Andy Dick, who plays an optometrist that wears thick glasses and can’t see, and Harland Williams, who plays a box boy who rambles metaphors. There are multiple times when it is obvious that they are improvising, or doing the schtick they’re known for. All of it degrades the film.

Vince (Shepard) is an egotistical prick who thinks he’s the shit, when in actuality he’s just a loser. However, everyone worships him because he’s the best grocery cashier at Club Super. In contrast, Zack (Cook) is a lazy box boy who likes to have fun at work, but is really a good guy underneath.

Each antagonizes the other constantly, causing their feud to intensify when a new cashier, Amy, is transferred to the store. Amy, of course, is played by Jessica Simpson. Both Vince and Zack try to win her affection the wrong way, by becoming “Employee of the Month.”

If Vince wins he’ll have won 18 months in a row and win a new car. If Zack wins he’ll show he’s not a slacker, and will look good in the eyes of Amy. The rest is easy to predict, but in case there’s interest, I won’t ruin it.

However, I will say Jessica Simpson isn’t as bad as I would have thought. She does a good job of not getting in the way, so I guess it’s a backhanded complement. Now, if only she could pursue work where she has some integrity and isn’t willingly showing off her cleavage.

Dane Cook is also really impressive, definitely stealing the show. He’s charming and charismatic, whether it’s his character or not he manages to pull it off. I could definitely see him going the romantic comedy route like John Cusack, only in better movies than this one.

Employee of the Month would be a fine flick to watch on Comedy Central, but as a theatrical experience it’s sorely lacking.