Rating: 2 Pulses
Hugh Jackman, Liev Schreiber
Directed by Gavin Hood
Rated PG-13
Since Bryan Singer’s X-Men was released in 2000, Hugh Jackman’s depiction of Wolverine has always been one of the highlights of the series. The mutton-chopped loner seemed somewhat more human than other mutants, lacking the flashier powers like flying, telekinesis or laser eyes, and instead relying on his claws, brute force and invulnerability. Wolverine can’t fight from afar; he has to get his hands dirty. Couple that with a mysterious past and a no-BS attitude and you’ve damn near got an archetype (or cliche, depending on who you ask). Now, with X-men Origins: Wolverine, 20th Century Fox is banking on all of the above to make this ill-inspired prequel the success it doesn’t deserve to be.
The story is quite loosely cribbed from the comic “Wolverine: Origins,” and despite contrary indications in the trailer, the story belongs solely to the title character. The film follows Logan, while becoming Wolverine, on a quest for vengeance against long-time rival Victor (Schreiber trying to act menacing despite having Meg Griffin’s useless power of . . . finger nails). Throughout his journey, Logan makes his rounds, visiting several mutants making an obligatory comic cameo, each briefly aiding him in his quest. When each character leaves you wanting more, it starts to become painfully obvious that Jackman’s Wolverine was all the more interesting playing a similar role in the periphery of a team of heroes in X-Men. I’m sure Deadpool and Gambit are next up for execution by spin-off, though the unintentionally hilarious John Wraith (Will i Am) would be my choice.
With intriguing but fleeting supporting characters and silly soap-opera melodramatics, the action could have been Origins’ saving grace. Instead, director Gavin Hood opted for uninspired set pieces (Hummers and helicopters are so summer of ’04) and fight-scene-friendly quick cuts (which can make anyone look like Steven Seagal, at least) and, least forgivable, CGI on par with Sci-Fi Channel original movies.
As food similes go, Wolverine is like the food at whatever fast-food chain it has a promotion with right now. Summer popcorn movies are supposed to be mindless fluff, enjoyable and vacuous, but these kernels are stale. But, of the two prequels out now, I hear the one about the space trip is pretty good.