Have you ever asked yourself the questions “what’s the point?” or “what’s it all about?” regarding life? Lately, I have heard those questions surfacing more frequently than usual. I have certainly asked myself those questions at different times in my life. It is not surprising that they surface when life has been particularly challenging or sorrowful. When things feel good in your life and relationships, you don’t tend to question the purpose of life as often.

When life is feeling good, you can find some good clues to assist you when it doesn’t feel so good and you find yourself questioning the value or purpose of existence. The clues are the company you keep, the activities you participate in, the information you entertain, the work you do, and what you have to look forward to.

“The meaning of life is to find your gift. The purpose of life is to give it away.” – Pablo Picasso

I remember a friend who struggled with relationship issues for many years. She read self-improvement books, attended workshops, had therapy and counseling, all in an effort to improve her choices in relationships. After many years she looked back at the history and patterns she’d created. There were clues that were helpful in identifying key factors that played a part in her decisions. Each relationship brought an opportunity for her to “spiral up.” This meant that she made progress in new relationships, even though there were still some less desirable patterns being repeated. She discovered that she didn’t need to be as hard on herself as she once had been. She wasn’t repeating all of the perceived mistakes or judgment calls from her past. She was progressing.

Progression is the natural order of life. We learn, discover, uncover and move forward. We are not meant to be stagnant, sedentary or idle indefinitely. We have a built-in (instinctual) threshold for all of those and when we’ve had enough, we will move beyond the moments of doubt, anxiousness, uncertainty and fear.

“You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something—your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.” – Steve Jobs

I remember a remarkable story of a man who was in prison for life due to his choices. He was bitter and felt there was no purpose to his life. Certainly a “what’s the point?” situation. After attending some self-awareness classes the question was posed to him, “what if your story could save just one boy by preventing him from making the same choices you made?” As he registered this question the answer became clearer. He would not want anyone to have to experience the same things he did. That became his purpose and mantra. He was able to “spiral up” in this situation and make a difference.

We can’t often outline what will happen in our lives, or how life’s experiences will shape us. We can, however, hold to the knowledge that there is a greater purpose at work. We are made to be useful, to prosper and increase.

“People take different roads seeking fulfillment and happiness. Just because they’re not on your road doesn’t mean they’ve gotten lost.” – Dalai Lama

Experiencing loss of a loved one is a particular thought-provoker. We feel so attached to the physical presence of a person, that when they are “gone” it can leave us with an emptiness that seems unbearable. Love is not something that stops. We embody love (lots of different levels of love, but love nonetheless). This embodiment is what supports and sustains us when the loss feels greater than our capacity to manage it. It is the same love that enables your presence to help another when they are going through a similar challenge.

These questions are meant to be asked. It is important to be introspective and contemplate what is important in life. You are a divine steward with innate gifts and talents. Pay attention to what you are good at, as it will reveal what you are meant to do on this planet. As you participate more in using these natural abilities, internal fulfillment will be more present and you will find yourself asking the “life” questions less.

So, what’s the point? What’s it all about? It’s about living, learning, sharing, growing and being an example to help others be able to “spiral up” through life. It’s about not being idle, stagnant or sedentary. It’s about being.